I grew up in what was once a small, Protestant New England Church. The old brick building still stands on the street front with its quintessential white tower, but by the time it was my church, it had become a very large congregation that took up a gymnasium sized room on a regular weekend. When Christmas and Easter rolled around, we often ended up sitting in the lobby on folding chairs while everyone tried to stay quiet enough to hear the sermon. One year, the pastor anticipated this surge in attendance and gave a sermon about welcoming holiday visitors rather than resenting the upheaval caused by those who were pejoratively called C+E Christians (in the Catholic Church, I guess you would have to add an “A” in there for Ash Wednesday).
During Holy Week, many of us will face the inconveniences and annoyances that visitors inevitably bring. But we are a missionary Church and inclusivity remains a top priority for us, as was expressed during the North American Continental Stage of the Synod and in the Final Document of the Synod itself. At a time when many of us still feel marginalized and unwelcomed by the Church – particularly women, youth, immigrants, homeless, members of minority groups and those who are differently abled – Holy Week gives us a coveted opportunity to welcome those on the margins into our communities. To seize this opportunity requires prayer. Prayers for patience with disruptions and changes. Prayers for selflessness as we put the needs of others before ourselves. Prayers for courage to reach out and greet strangers. Prayers for discernment to know how to act in each unique situation.
It also requires shifts in our perspectives. First and foremost, we must remember why we are in Church: to celebrate a living Christ who died for all people and whose final prayers were for our unity; to participate in the miracle of Christ’s sacrifice of the Eucharist which is a gift so wonderful we cannot help but want to share it; and to worship our God who says that what we do to the least of our brothers and sisters we do to Him. But it also requires a shift in how we view the strangers who are filling up the pews and taking up the parking spaces. Rather than merely visitors, they are our brothers and sisters who share our dignity and value as images of God. Many also share our dignity as baptized members of the body of Christ. They are our honored guests and we can rejoice that they are joining us, just as the father rejoiced at the return of the prodigal son. We have reason to celebrate – we are an Easter people, after all – and our joy ought only to be multiplied by the chance to share this celebration with brothers and sisters. Moreover, they one could argue that they are not really guests at all, but people who have come home to the house of their Father. They are right where God wants them to be.
From a practical standpoint, welcoming unfamiliar parishioners to our Holy Week masses can take many forms. Before Holy Week even begins, we can consider inviting someone to join us at church. The Lewis Center for Church Leadership suggests that this is a good way to help someone who might not be comfortable entering an unfamiliar space to benefit from our presence with them. We can also work with our church to make sure that there are obvious signs indicating where visitors can find bathrooms and play or cry rooms. We may even take this opportunity to restock children’s areas with books, coloring supplies, comfortable seating, and quiet toys. Another issue to address with churches prior to Holy Week is how to accommodate those with particular physical or sensory needs. Of course, it is impossible to anticipate all of the needs that might arise, but when people see that an effort has been made to address some common issues, they will be more comfortable helping us to meet their own needs in the future. We can ask whether there is a quiet room where people who struggle with overstimulation can participate in the Mass. Are gluten free hosts available? Is there a section of the church that can be designated as “low incense” for those who are sensitive to it? During my three full-term pregnancies, incense made me faint and I had to leave Mass on more than one occasion because of it. A church that provided an area where servers and priests will not bring incense would have been an incredible blessing, particularly during this incense heavy season.
As we begin our preparations for next week, we can also take time to pray for those guests who will be attending our churches. We can ask God to help them feel welcomed but, most importantly, that they will encounter the risen Christ in powerful ways. We can also ask that they will have peace and courage as they come into an unfamiliar, potentially overwhelming, or even threatening place. Some of the people who will be entering our churches next week have been seriously injured by the Church through physical, sexual, or spiritual abuse. Others experience intense pain when they are unable to receive the Eucharist for any number of reasons. We should be praying for these people and for those who will not be joining us during our Holy Week liturgies because they have been so wounded that entering a church building has become impossible.
When we arrive at church for Holy Week masses, we can strive to act in ways that are pleasant and not hostile or annoyed. When we pull into the parking lot, we can take some deep breaths when we are stuck behind someone who is slowly maneuvering their car and blocking traffic. Then, if we are physically able, we might choose to park farther away from the entrance than usual so that guests can have more convenient parking. As we leave our cars, we can try to smile at those around us and wish them “Happy Palm Sunday,” or a “Blessed Holy Thursday.” If we are feeling particularly courageous, we might even consider commenting on how adorable their children are or making small talk about unusual weather. Christianity Today suggests that we have some “talking points” ready to initiate easy conversations once interactions have been initiated. Questions like, “Have you been coming here long?” or “Do you have plans later?” can facilitate slightly deeper conversation without being too personal or taking more time than it takes to walk from your car to the entrance.
Once inside, we can think about how to fill the pews in a considerate way so that there are no big gaps that are hard to access. Minister and writer Corey Trevathon suggests that we should invite people to sit with us, rather than allowing ourselves to become disgruntled that our preferred seats are taken. We can pay special attention to making sure that aisles and handicapped spaces remain open and free of obstacles. Those of us in particularly blessed congregations that are so full that there is not enough seating for everyone can volunteer to stand or sit on the floor in back. We can rejoice that so many people have come to worship God!
During the liturgy, there are multiple things that we can do to remain welcoming even as we maintain our focus on Christ. We can smile whenever we meet someone’s eyes, offer assistance with finding the order of the liturgy in the missal or the correct hymn, and tactfully avoid making frequent glances towards rowdy children or noises made by those who are differently abled. We can put effort into making our Rite of Peace heart-felt. We can ensure that our children’s snacks are not messy and do not contain common allergens that could make the families of allergic children anxious. We can offer help and solidarity to parents who are struggling with their children’s behavior, picking up dropped toys, smiling at little ones, or offering compliments and encouragement after the Mass has ended. We can make a point of wishing a Happy Easter to those who sit alone and the elderly.
Throughout Holy Week, we must wrestle with any judgement in our hearts. When we are tempted to look down on families with poorly behaving children, we can instead remember times when our own children misbehaved or consider the unknown factors which may be contributing to such behaviors. If we are tempted to feel proud that we are following the order of the Mass with visible piety, we can think about those who may be entering a Catholic Church for the first time and are confused by the rituals or distracted by the artwork. As a Catholic convert from a Church that had a single, simple cross, it took me months to be able to focus on the Mass and not be constantly distracted by the images and stories depicted around me. There are any number of reasons to have mercy on those around us, the most important being Jesus himself.
As Pope Francis has said, the Church “is a field hospital after battle.” There is perhaps no other time of year when this is more apparent than during Holy Week. It gets messy. It feels chaotic. It is loud and uncomfortable. It might not even smell particularly good. It is full of both the visibly wounded and the invisibly wounded. It holds and serves enemies without distinction. It embraces everyone. It is a place of mercy, healing, gratitude, and joy. It is a place where resurrections occur and those who are past hope receive miracles. The living Christ walks among the wounded and the healers – there is no better place to be.
Image: “Holy Week 2017: Holy Thursday – Washing” (CC BY 2.0) by Johnragai-Moment Catcher
Ariane Sroubek is a writer, school psychologist and mother to two children here on earth. Prior to converting to Catholicism, she completed undergraduate studies in Bible and Theology at Gordon College in Wenham, MA. She then went on to obtain her doctorate in School and Child Clinical Psychology. Ariane’s writing is inspired by her faith, daily life experiences and education. She is currently writing a women's fiction novel and a middle-grade mystery series. Her non-fiction book, Raising Sunshine: A Guide to Parenting Through the Aftermath of Infant Death is available on Amazon. More of her work can be found at https://mysustaininggrace.com.
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