A review of the book The Virtue of Affability or Friendliness and Its Relevance in Modern Evangelization by Anne DeSantis (En Route Books and Media, 2024).
The Virtue of Affability or Friendliness and Its Relevance in Modern Evangelization offers a much-needed corrective to the polarized extremes within the Church that often overlook its rich tradition of grace-filled, joyful witness to the Faith. By grounding evangelization in the gifts of the Holy Spirit—gentleness, patience, kindness, and above all, charity—a respectful dialogue can flourish, fostering deeper friendship, mutual understanding, and genuine enrichment among individuals who might otherwise remain religious or ideological opponents. As Catholic philosopher Blaise Pascal wisely observed, Christians can sometimes “make truth itself into an idol,” but “truth apart from charity is not God, but his image; it is an idol which must in no way be loved or worshipped.” (Pensées, B 582, L 926.)
Echoing St. John Paul II’s vision for building a “civilization of love,” expressed in his reflections on the jubilee of the third millennium and his encyclical Ut Unum Sint (“that they may all be one”), this work demonstrates that true mission is neither timid nor coercive. Instead, it is firmly anchored in respect for the dignity of every human person. Pope Francis embodies this approach through his approachable smile, merciful heart, and tender spirit—an example that renews confidence in the Church and her mission. Notably, under his pontificate, the Church’s growth has surpassed the global population replacement rate.
Drawing on vivid examples throughout history—such as Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati, whose simple friendships became profound channels of grace—Dr. DeSantis illustrates how everyday acts of empathy, hospitality, and sincere accompaniment cultivate authentic holiness. She also cautions that neglecting the virtue of friendliness weakens Christian witness, creating unnecessary barriers and reinforcing negative perceptions about Christians, such as hypocrisy or the oft-repeated slogan, “no hate like Christian love,” when hollow rhetoric overshadows caritas.
In an age yearning for sincerity and sacrificial love, the virtue of affability emerges as a vital antidote to the culture of despair and death. It offers a compelling and vibrant model of evangelization rooted in warmth, integrity, and genuine Christian love.
Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash
Andrew Likoudis is a student of business and entrepreneurship at Towson University, an associate member of the Society for Catholic Liturgy, and the editor of several books on the papacy and Catholic ecclesiology. He runs a column titled Nature & Grace at Patheos.com.
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